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Post by Blank77 on 9/8/2011, 8:06 pm

OK, to stop anyone from getting the wrong impression, this isn't anything about my DD or team...but I know a few that are at the "wtf did I do" stage. Without getting into the why or the argument if it is right, just looking for what to do if you are 100% out the door. We have only done QT, so, without any league games, could you get a release and your money back? If you got a release, can you go to another club or would it be just to rec? I know some of you have seen this go down, and I know at least one 00 who got out early last season, so I know it is possible. Anyone have any more insight, experience, or answers on this topic?



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Post by tmcc on 9/8/2011, 11:15 pm

I was wondering if your avatar was real or not and then I noticed the guy in orange sitting in the background. That is a helluva hit.
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Post by hobbit on 9/8/2011, 11:58 pm

tmcc wrote:I was wondering if your avatar was real or not and then I noticed the guy in orange sitting in the background. That is a helluva hit.

Until you pointed out that guy I never even noticed.....
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Post by hobbit on 9/8/2011, 11:58 pm

Blank77 wrote:OK, to stop anyone from getting the wrong impression, this isn't anything about my DD or team...but I know a few that are at the "wtf did I do" stage. Without getting into the why or the argument if it is right, just looking for what to do if you are 100% out the door. We have only done QT, so, without any league games, could you get a release and your money back? If you got a release, can you go to another club or would it be just to rec? I know some of you have seen this go down, and I know at least one 00 who got out early last season, so I know it is possible. Anyone have any more insight, experience, or answers on this topic?



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No idea, but I am sure there are more than just one or two looking for this information.
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Post by It Is No Longer Me on 10/8/2011, 12:26 am

Blank77 wrote:OK, to stop anyone from getting the wrong impression, this isn't anything about my DD or team...but I know a few that are at the "wtf did I do" stage. Without getting into the why or the argument if it is right, just looking for what to do if you are 100% out the door. We have only done QT, so, without any league games, could you get a release and your money back? If you got a release, can you go to another club or would it be just to rec? I know some of you have seen this go down, and I know at least one 00 who got out early last season, so I know it is possible. Anyone have any more insight, experience, or answers on this topic?



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Because the "few" are on teams that have been relegated to Plano or Arlington? Tell them to get over it and play out the season. There is good soccer to be had in both locations.
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Post by geno105 on 10/8/2011, 10:36 am

Blank77 wrote:OK, to stop anyone from getting the wrong impression, this isn't anything about my DD or team...but I know a few that are at the "wtf did I do" stage. Without getting into the why or the argument if it is right, just looking for what to do if you are 100% out the door. We have only done QT, so, without any league games, could you get a release and your money back? If you got a release, can you go to another club or would it be just to rec? I know some of you have seen this go down, and I know at least one 00 who got out early last season, so I know it is possible. Anyone have any more insight, experience, or answers on this topic?

It's possible just not easy to do. See NTSSA Rules 3.10.7

http://ntx.sportstech.net/Shared%20Documents/ntssa_rules.pdf

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Post by AlterEgo on 10/8/2011, 10:46 am

Don't think it would be easy or you could have a mass exodus of players leaving teams that didn't make Lake Highlands. Crap, we didn't make D1 so time for a new team.
My little birdies tell me that there are at least 2 players looking to leave D1 teams and not for playing time reasons. One of the teams is easily top 10.
Very interesting twist to the plot.


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Post by jm23jm on 10/8/2011, 11:19 am

AlterEgo wrote:Don't think it would be easy or you could have a mass exodus of players leaving teams that didn't make Lake Highlands. Crap, we didn't make D1 so time for a new team.
My little birdies tell me that there are at least 2 players looking to leave D1 teams and not for playing time reasons. One of the teams is easily top 10.
Very interesting twist to the plot.


I hope they are not from my teams. I would give them a release in a heartbeat. An unhappy parent or player can cause lots of problems.

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Post by **SweetFeet** on 10/8/2011, 11:25 am

I beleive its an easy process as long as the coach and "club" are ok with it.

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Post by 50/50 on 10/8/2011, 11:34 am

It's easy to get a release to play Rec. I think you can even bypass Coach if it is a bad situation and just have North Texas sign a Rec. release. The tricky part is getting a competitive release. This is the one that will allow the DD to play select soccer for another select team. The easiest way is to talk to coach, make him understand where you are coming from and have him sign the competitive release. If he refuses then you have to go through North Texas for a hearing and these do not work out very often, although I know of a few that have and one took an appeal process to get done. IMHO if the situation is not harmful to your DD, and she is playing the majority of the games, no matter what division or league you are in just sit tight. Take the pressure off her and yourself for a year, work on skills and private lessons, and move on after the Fall Season at the earliest; and better yet wait the full soccer year out ,monitor other teams/coaches during this time, and make an informed decision next year.
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Post by **SweetFeet** on 10/8/2011, 11:38 am

50/50 wrote:It's easy to get a release to play Rec. I think you can even bypass Coach if it is a bad situation and just have North Texas sign a Rec. release. The tricky part is getting a competitive release. This is the one that will allow the DD to play select soccer for another select team. The easiest way is to talk to coach, make him understand where you are coming from and have him sign the competitive release. If he refuses then you have to go through North Texas for a hearing and these do not work out very often, although I know of a few that have and one took an appeal process to get done. IMHO if the situation is not harmful to your DD, and she is playing the majority of the games, no matter what division or league you are in just sit tight. Take the pressure off her and yourself for a year, work on skills and private lessons, and move on after the Fall Season at the earliest; and better yet wait the full soccer year out ,monitor other teams/coaches during this time, and make an informed decision next year.

I agree with 50/50...but the reason i say its an easy process is cause I got a competitive release...

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Post by shasta on 10/8/2011, 11:44 am

**SweetFeet** wrote:
50/50 wrote:It's easy to get a release to play Rec. I think you can even bypass Coach if it is a bad situation and just have North Texas sign a Rec. release. The tricky part is getting a competitive release. This is the one that will allow the DD to play select soccer for another select team. The easiest way is to talk to coach, make him understand where you are coming from and have him sign the competitive release. If he refuses then you have to go through North Texas for a hearing and these do not work out very often, although I know of a few that have and one took an appeal process to get done. IMHO if the situation is not harmful to your DD, and she is playing the majority of the games, no matter what division or league you are in just sit tight. Take the pressure off her and yourself for a year, work on skills and private lessons, and move on after the Fall Season at the earliest; and better yet wait the full soccer year out ,monitor other teams/coaches during this time, and make an informed decision next year.

I agree with 50/50...but the reason i say its an easy process is cause I got a competitive release...


Did you switch within the same club? Or, pay two club fees? Or, get your money back from the first club?

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Post by reapersweeper on 10/8/2011, 11:46 am

jm23jm wrote:
AlterEgo wrote:Don't think it would be easy or you could have a mass exodus of players leaving teams that didn't make Lake Highlands. Crap, we didn't make D1 so time for a new team.
My little birdies tell me that there are at least 2 players looking to leave D1 teams and not for playing time reasons. One of the teams is easily top 10.
Very interesting twist to the plot.


I hope they are not from my teams. I would give them a release in a heartbeat. An unhappy parent or player can cause lots of problems.

I love this about you coach. Our old coach (99's) told us he would release our child, then wouldn't. Said he would let her practice with another coach through the year so she could maintain skills, then wouldn't allow it. It finally took almost four months for him to sign a release but only as long as it was where he said she could play. I don't post much and saw a whole thread on how you need to stick it out with the team because it teaches your daughter that they have to fight through the challenging times. Although I agree with that wholeheartedly, your coach has to be able to work with you as well. They have to be able to communicate with your child and set expectations. The problem is that most on that whole topic spoke in generalities but each situation is different. Sometimes you have to teach your DD that their personal development as a chid is much more important than having the coach completely disintegrate their self confidence, bully, and lie to them. Sometimes it is best to just walk away from that situation. I would rather teach my daughter that she can stand up for herself rather than allow someone to continue to degrade her as a person. Generally their isn't any other parent on that team that will stick their necks out for you unless it directly affects their child. It is the "it's better them than us" syndrom. They'll come up to you and talk about just how wrong it is that your DD is being treated that way, but do absolutely nothing to help. Saw it and lived it.

I believe at this level that if a parent/child asks for a release than they should get it. They aren't professional players and we shouldn't be so wrapped up in winning that we are scared to death they'll go play for another team. The ultimate goal should be about the development of the DD and their future in soccer.

Kudos to you coach for taking that stance and I hope that every coach would be gracious enough to check their pride at the door to allow the DD to move on and find a place they are comfortable.

My 01 decided not to play this year after playing for years on a top 10 team. If she ever decides to play again I would hope that it is with a quality coach that understands the individual needs of the players and not just the overall needs of the team (they are both important). Those are truly successful coaches in my opinion.

If someone is wants to get a release, it can be done. There are requirements. The easiest is to have the gaining coach and releasing coach's signatures allowing the transfer of the player. The other way is petitioning North Texas during the acceptable time to gain a release. Almost all of these are accepted as the coaches are too lazy to go up before the hearing. However, most of the time you will be leaving money on the table at the old team. Ask yourself if leaving the money is worth it. For us, our DD is much happier, slowly gaining her confidence back as a player. So well worth it.
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Post by 50/50 on 10/8/2011, 11:56 am


Did you switch within the same club? Or, pay two club fees? Or, get your money back from the first club?[/quote]


I also got a competitive release for my DD in our first year of Select. It was not too hard but I was able to convince Coach that signing was the best thing for my DD and his own reputation and he signed. As far as the money goes North Texas officially considers that an issue between parent and club only. They first want to know only if the DD broke any North Texas rules on or off the pitch. You will have to come to some sort of agreement with the club/coach on money, and it usually involves you paying more, and for sure not receiving a refund. You have to remember that the team fees were divided by a certain number of players and it is not right to go back and ask anyone to pay more money no matter how unhappy your new state of mind might be. In our case we had paid in full for the soccer year, as we should to honor our commitment to the team and other parents on the team. The new team asked only for Uniform money from us since they had already divided up the team fees with the original number of players. We did not ask for or receive any refund. In the bigger clubs where it is all about the $$ sometimes that is exactly what they will ask for to "sell" you a competitive release.


Last edited by 50/50 on 10/8/2011, 12:06 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Post by thiescj on 10/8/2011, 12:02 pm

I can see both views on this topic. My first take on this is that you signed a contract knowing full well what was involved and the committment needed to live up to it. You signed a contract so honor it. What if 2 girls decide to leave after qualifying for any reason, where does that leave the team? It is not only a committment that you have made to the coach but also the team.

On the other hand I can see where an unhappy player and parents could totally disrupt a team. Maybe a player was promised something and the coach didn't come through. Who knows? But the fact remains they are not happy. Maybe the team is just not a good fit for your daughter and it took until now to realize that. Why should the kid be punished and have to stay with a team she and the parents are obviously do not want to be apart of? Who benefits in this situation?

Tough call and I wouldn't want to be a parent or a coach having to deal with it. I think I am more on the side of if you have a kid or parent who is unhappy let them try to find success elsewhere. These are young girls and not high paid athletes bitching about how they can barely support their families on their multi-million dollar contracts.
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Post by reapersweeper on 10/8/2011, 12:32 pm

thiescj wrote:I can see both views on this topic. My first take on this is that you signed a contract knowing full well what was involved and the committment needed to live up to it. You signed a contract so honor it. What if 2 girls decide to leave after qualifying for any reason, where does that leave the team? It is not only a committment that you have made to the coach but also the team.

On the other hand I can see where an unhappy player and parents could totally disrupt a team. Maybe a player was promised something and the coach didn't come through. Who knows? But the fact remains they are not happy. Maybe the team is just not a good fit for your daughter and it took until now to realize that. Why should the kid be punished and have to stay with a team she and the parents are obviously do not want to be apart of? Who benefits in this situation?

Tough call and I wouldn't want to be a parent or a coach having to deal with it. I think I am more on the side of if you have a kid or parent who is unhappy let them try to find success elsewhere. These are young girls and not high paid athletes bitching about how they can barely support their families on their multi-million dollar contracts.

On the contract statement......remember that the contract goes both way. The coach is contracted to develop a product and thus should provide at least a reasonable attempt at doing so. Too many times we let the coaches out of their responsbilities. And YES, we were told many things prior to signing that ended up being wrong and stuff that was added to our responsibilities as parents after the signing of the contract. So, just because you sign a contract does not mean that you know full well what it ALL entails. You have to live it to know it counselor!
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Post by txtransplant on 10/8/2011, 12:42 pm

reapersweeper wrote:The coach is contracted to develop a product and thus should provide at least a reasonable attempt at doing so. Too many times we let the coaches out of their responsbilities. And YES, we were told many things prior to signing that ended up being wrong and stuff that was added to our responsibilities as parents after the signing of the contract. So, just because you sign a contract does not mean that you know full well what it ALL entails.
I consider myself extremely fortunate that a work associate told my husband about this website when we moved to NTx at the beginning of the year. If they hadn't and I wasn't able to find out exactly what club soccer/going select entailed, etc, we could have easily been up the proverbial creek without a paddle.

While at a June indoor game, my husband was approached by two men from a club and they told him they had an '01 team that would be playing in Lake Highlands. Not only are they not IN Lake Highlands, they didn't have enough players to register a team for the qualifying tournament and at this point are still looking for players.

Fortunately, I had learned enough to know it was B.S. they were trying to sell.
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Post by Guest on 10/8/2011, 12:54 pm

reapersweeper wrote:
jm23jm wrote:
AlterEgo wrote:Don't think it would be easy or you could have a mass exodus of players leaving teams that didn't make Lake Highlands. Crap, we didn't make D1 so time for a new team.
My little birdies tell me that there are at least 2 players looking to leave D1 teams and not for playing time reasons. One of the teams is easily top 10.
Very interesting twist to the plot.


I hope they are not from my teams. I would give them a release in a heartbeat. An unhappy parent or player can cause lots of problems.

I love this about you coach. Our old coach (99's) told us he would release our child, then wouldn't. Said he would let her practice with another coach through the year so she could maintain skills, then wouldn't allow it. It finally took almost four months for him to sign a release but only as long as it was where he said she could play. I don't post much and saw a whole thread on how you need to stick it out with the team because it teaches your daughter that they have to fight through the challenging times. Although I agree with that wholeheartedly, your coach has to be able to work with you as well. They have to be able to communicate with your child and set expectations. The problem is that most on that whole topic spoke in generalities but each situation is different. Sometimes you have to teach your DD that their personal development as a chid is much more important than having the coach completely disintegrate their self confidence, bully, and lie to them. Sometimes it is best to just walk away from that situation. I would rather teach my daughter that she can stand up for herself rather than allow someone to continue to degrade her as a person. Generally their isn't any other parent on that team that will stick their necks out for you unless it directly affects their child. It is the "it's better them than us" syndrom. They'll come up to you and talk about just how wrong it is that your DD is being treated that way, but do absolutely nothing to help. Saw it and lived it.

I believe at this level that if a parent/child asks for a release than they should get it. They aren't professional players and we shouldn't be so wrapped up in winning that we are scared to death they'll go play for another team. The ultimate goal should be about the development of the DD and their future in soccer.

Kudos to you coach for taking that stance and I hope that every coach would be gracious enough to check their pride at the door to allow the DD to move on and find a place they are comfortable.

My 01 decided not to play this year after playing for years on a top 10 team. If she ever decides to play again I would hope that it is with a quality coach that understands the individual needs of the players and not just the overall needs of the team (they are both important). Those are truly successful coaches in my opinion.

If someone is wants to get a release, it can be done. There are requirements. The easiest is to have the gaining coach and releasing coach's signatures allowing the transfer of the player. The other way is petitioning North Texas during the acceptable time to gain a release. Almost all of these are accepted as the coaches are too lazy to go up before the hearing. However, most of the time you will be leaving money on the table at the old team. Ask yourself if leaving the money is worth it. For us, our DD is much happier, slowly gaining her confidence back as a player. So well worth it.

Who are you trying to fool. This is America! It's always about winning....

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Post by Gunners on 10/8/2011, 1:01 pm

AllenAmerican wrote:
reapersweeper wrote:
jm23jm wrote:
AlterEgo wrote:Don't think it would be easy or you could have a mass exodus of players leaving teams that didn't make Lake Highlands. Crap, we didn't make D1 so time for a new team.
My little birdies tell me that there are at least 2 players looking to leave D1 teams and not for playing time reasons. One of the teams is easily top 10.
Very interesting twist to the plot.


I hope they are not from my teams. I would give them a release in a heartbeat. An unhappy parent or player can cause lots of problems.

I love this about you coach. Our old coach (99's) told us he would release our child, then wouldn't. Said he would let her practice with another coach through the year so she could maintain skills, then wouldn't allow it. It finally took almost four months for him to sign a release but only as long as it was where he said she could play. I don't post much and saw a whole thread on how you need to stick it out with the team because it teaches your daughter that they have to fight through the challenging times. Although I agree with that wholeheartedly, your coach has to be able to work with you as well. They have to be able to communicate with your child and set expectations. The problem is that most on that whole topic spoke in generalities but each situation is different. Sometimes you have to teach your DD that their personal development as a chid is much more important than having the coach completely disintegrate their self confidence, bully, and lie to them. Sometimes it is best to just walk away from that situation. I would rather teach my daughter that she can stand up for herself rather than allow someone to continue to degrade her as a person. Generally their isn't any other parent on that team that will stick their necks out for you unless it directly affects their child. It is the "it's better them than us" syndrom. They'll come up to you and talk about just how wrong it is that your DD is being treated that way, but do absolutely nothing to help. Saw it and lived it.

I believe at this level that if a parent/child asks for a release than they should get it. They aren't professional players and we shouldn't be so wrapped up in winning that we are scared to death they'll go play for another team. The ultimate goal should be about the development of the DD and their future in soccer.

Kudos to you coach for taking that stance and I hope that every coach would be gracious enough to check their pride at the door to allow the DD to move on and find a place they are comfortable.

My 01 decided not to play this year after playing for years on a top 10 team. If she ever decides to play again I would hope that it is with a quality coach that understands the individual needs of the players and not just the overall needs of the team (they are both important). Those are truly successful coaches in my opinion.

If someone is wants to get a release, it can be done. There are requirements. The easiest is to have the gaining coach and releasing coach's signatures allowing the transfer of the player. The other way is petitioning North Texas during the acceptable time to gain a release. Almost all of these are accepted as the coaches are too lazy to go up before the hearing. However, most of the time you will be leaving money on the table at the old team. Ask yourself if leaving the money is worth it. For us, our DD is much happier, slowly gaining her confidence back as a player. So well worth it.

Who are you trying to fool. This is America! It's always about winning....

Looks to me like the "bottom" in your avatar isn't winning much at all...

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Post by txtransplant on 10/8/2011, 1:04 pm

Gunners wrote:Looks to me like the "bottom" in your avatar isn't winning much at all...
Now you see it, now you don't. lol
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Post by Guest on 10/8/2011, 1:05 pm

Gunners wrote:
AllenAmerican wrote:
reapersweeper wrote:
jm23jm wrote:
AlterEgo wrote:Don't think it would be easy or you could have a mass exodus of players leaving teams that didn't make Lake Highlands. Crap, we didn't make D1 so time for a new team.
My little birdies tell me that there are at least 2 players looking to leave D1 teams and not for playing time reasons. One of the teams is easily top 10.
Very interesting twist to the plot.


I hope they are not from my teams. I would give them a release in a heartbeat. An unhappy parent or player can cause lots of problems.

I love this about you coach. Our old coach (99's) told us he would release our child, then wouldn't. Said he would let her practice with another coach through the year so she could maintain skills, then wouldn't allow it. It finally took almost four months for him to sign a release but only as long as it was where he said she could play. I don't post much and saw a whole thread on how you need to stick it out with the team because it teaches your daughter that they have to fight through the challenging times. Although I agree with that wholeheartedly, your coach has to be able to work with you as well. They have to be able to communicate with your child and set expectations. The problem is that most on that whole topic spoke in generalities but each situation is different. Sometimes you have to teach your DD that their personal development as a chid is much more important than having the coach completely disintegrate their self confidence, bully, and lie to them. Sometimes it is best to just walk away from that situation. I would rather teach my daughter that she can stand up for herself rather than allow someone to continue to degrade her as a person. Generally their isn't any other parent on that team that will stick their necks out for you unless it directly affects their child. It is the "it's better them than us" syndrom. They'll come up to you and talk about just how wrong it is that your DD is being treated that way, but do absolutely nothing to help. Saw it and lived it.

I believe at this level that if a parent/child asks for a release than they should get it. They aren't professional players and we shouldn't be so wrapped up in winning that we are scared to death they'll go play for another team. The ultimate goal should be about the development of the DD and their future in soccer.

Kudos to you coach for taking that stance and I hope that every coach would be gracious enough to check their pride at the door to allow the DD to move on and find a place they are comfortable.

My 01 decided not to play this year after playing for years on a top 10 team. If she ever decides to play again I would hope that it is with a quality coach that understands the individual needs of the players and not just the overall needs of the team (they are both important). Those are truly successful coaches in my opinion.

If someone is wants to get a release, it can be done. There are requirements. The easiest is to have the gaining coach and releasing coach's signatures allowing the transfer of the player. The other way is petitioning North Texas during the acceptable time to gain a release. Almost all of these are accepted as the coaches are too lazy to go up before the hearing. However, most of the time you will be leaving money on the table at the old team. Ask yourself if leaving the money is worth it. For us, our DD is much happier, slowly gaining her confidence back as a player. So well worth it.

Who are you trying to fool. This is America! It's always about winning....

Looks to me like the "bottom" in your avatar isn't winning much at all...

Whats wrong with fluffy's bottom?

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Post by Blank77 on 10/8/2011, 1:06 pm

txtransplant wrote:
Gunners wrote:Looks to me like the "bottom" in your avatar isn't winning much at all...
Now you see it, now you don't. lol

Well that all depends on how speshal the interaction is....
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Post by Guest on 10/8/2011, 1:12 pm

txtransplant wrote:
Gunners wrote:Looks to me like the "bottom" in your avatar isn't winning much at all...
Now you see it, now you don't. lol

I was just demonstarting the point that "WHEN YOU HAVE A HIDIOUSLY OFFENDING AVATAR, YOU SHOULD CHANGE IT"....HINT cyclops

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Post by Sweeper on 10/8/2011, 1:13 pm

Blank77 wrote:
txtransplant wrote:
Gunners wrote:Looks to me like the "bottom" in your avatar isn't winning much at all...
Now you see it, now you don't. lol

Well that all depends on how speshal the interaction is....

I don't understand this joke at all, but why in the world would anyone put a dog in a bikini in the first place. The SPCA should crack down on that kind of humiliation.
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Post by txtransplant on 10/8/2011, 1:17 pm

AllenAmerican wrote:
txtransplant wrote:
Gunners wrote:Looks to me like the "bottom" in your avatar isn't winning much at all...
Now you see it, now you don't. lol

I was just demonstarting the point that "WHEN YOU HAVE A HIDIOUSLY OFFENDING AVATAR, YOU SHOULD CHANGE IT"....HINT cyclops

*bats eyes innocently* would you prefer something like this.....

OK, I signed with the anti-christ, how do I get out of it? BDUTEXAS

cheers
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