Re: OK, I signed with the anti-christ, how do I get out of it?

by txtransplant 10/08/11, 11:17 am

AllenAmerican wrote:
txtransplant wrote:
Gunners wrote:Looks to me like the "bottom" in your avatar isn't winning much at all...
Now you see it, now you don't. lol

I was just demonstarting the point that "WHEN YOU HAVE A HIDIOUSLY OFFENDING AVATAR, YOU SHOULD CHANGE IT"....HINT

*bats eyes innocently* would you prefer something like this.....

OK, I signed with the anti-christ, how do I get out of it? - Page 2 BDUTEXAS

by txtransplant 10/08/11, 11:19 am

Sweeper wrote:
Blank77 wrote:
txtransplant wrote:
Gunners wrote:Looks to me like the "bottom" in your avatar isn't winning much at all...
Now you see it, now you don't. lol

Well that all depends on how speshal the interaction is....

I don't understand this joke at all, but why in the world would anyone put a dog in a bikini in the first place. The SPCA should crack down on that kind of humiliation.

The doggie replaced one of a player taking it worse than the chick in Blank's avi.

ETA: Ooopsies... double post. Sowwy.

by OrangeBlooded 10/08/11, 12:45 pm

txtransplant wrote:
AllenAmerican wrote:
txtransplant wrote:
Gunners wrote:Looks to me like the "bottom" in your avatar isn't winning much at all...
Now you see it, now you don't. lol

I was just demonstarting the point that "WHEN YOU HAVE A HIDIOUSLY OFFENDING AVATAR, YOU SHOULD CHANGE IT"....HINT

*bats eyes innocently* would you prefer something like this.....

OK, I signed with the anti-christ, how do I get out of it? - Page 2 Ousuck10

IMO . . . this is MUCH more appropriate!!!!!!! lol!

by BabyArm 10/08/11, 12:46 pm

thiescj wrote:I can see both views on this topic. My first take on this is that you signed a contract knowing full well what was involved and the committment needed to live up to it. You signed a contract so honor it. What if 2 girls decide to leave after qualifying for any reason, where does that leave the team? It is not only a committment that you have made to the coach but also the team.

On the other hand I can see where an unhappy player and parents could totally disrupt a team. Maybe a player was promised something and the coach didn't come through. Who knows? But the fact remains they are not happy. Maybe the team is just not a good fit for your daughter and it took until now to realize that. Why should the kid be punished and have to stay with a team she and the parents are obviously do not want to be apart of? Who benefits in this situation?

Tough call and I wouldn't want to be a parent or a coach having to deal with it. I think I am more on the side of if you have a kid or parent who is unhappy let them try to find success elsewhere. These are young girls and not high paid athletes bitching about how they can barely support their families on their multi-million dollar contracts.

Thiescj,

I guess the first question that comes to mind is, what would moving to a new team accomplish? 1. At this point, you disrupt the chemistry that the new team has formed. 2. What happens if, it's not a good fit? I guess you leave that team also, or do you stick it out (which is what you should've done with team #1)? 3. What kind of reception do you think you will recieve when everyone knows (small soccer community) you left 14-15 other girls high and dry because you "all of a sudden" weren't happy? Unless, you've decided to pass on year 1 and just go to a skills trainer, stay with you're origianal team. Just my opinon.

by txtransplant 10/08/11, 12:58 pm

OrangeBlooded wrote:IMO . . . this is MUCH more appropriate!!!!!!!

I've never seen that one before. Sleep

And I like this icon afro

It reminds me of Billy Sims. cheers

But back on topic, I have to agree with the arguments BabyArm made. And really, how gunshy will the next coach be to sign your kid if they think there is a possibility you may up and leave them high and dry a month later? It seems like in the NTx soccer world, if you burn a bridge others will definitely see the smoke.

by Guest 10/08/11, 01:50 pm

OrangeBlooded wrote:
txtransplant wrote:
AllenAmerican wrote:
txtransplant wrote:
Gunners wrote:Looks to me like the "bottom" in your avatar isn't winning much at all...
Now you see it, now you don't. lol

I was just demonstarting the point that "WHEN YOU HAVE A HIDIOUSLY OFFENDING AVATAR, YOU SHOULD CHANGE IT"....HINT

*bats eyes innocently* would you prefer something like this.....

IMO . . . this is MUCH more appropriate!!!!!!!

Holy S**t!!!!! I like that one too! cheers

by Blank77 10/08/11, 01:54 pm

by Guest 10/08/11, 02:00 pm

Blank77 wrote:

Has the original poster informed the discovery channel/Vatican who the anti-christ really is? Was this in one of Nostradomus' quatraines?

by ballhead 10/08/11, 02:14 pm

txtransplant wrote:
OrangeBlooded wrote:IMO . . . this is MUCH more appropriate!!!!!!!
I've never seen that one before.

And I like this icon It reminds me of Billy Sims.

But back on topic, I have to agree with the arguments BabyArm made. And really, how gunshy will the next coach be to sign your kid if they think there is a possibility you may up and leave them high and dry a month later? It seems like in the NTx soccer world, if you burn a bridge others will definitely see the smoke.

It all depends on how good your dd is. I know of more that one player that have stiffed teams out of several thousand dollars, but always seem to be able to find a spot somewhere. Perhaps not coincidentally, these players are frequently are the ones that want to extend payment beyond the normal terms, then quite after the fall season leaving the team high and dry.

Sometimes injuries cause a coach to take a player they wouldn't ordinarily take. Sometimes the player just addresses a need, but coaches don't care as much about getting the dues paid as the manager does.

As mentioned previously, NTX couldn't care less about the financial end. That's between the player and the club.

In my experience, the system normally works like this:

Player makes an attempt to resolve things with coach (some try harder than others). If its successful, the coach signs the transfer, all is well. If not, step two.

Player petitions NTX for release to rec. This is pretty automatic.

Player can practice with and guest for competitive teams. NTX signs release in place of coach.

Player sometimes attempts to negotiate with former team to get them to agree to a transfer. Negotiation often includes full or partial payment of outstanding dues.

If there is no negotiation, or it fails, after some time (but before the deadline), the player goes back to NTX to ask for permission to transfer to another competitive team. NTX is often sympathetic, and allows the transfer.

You'd be surprised how many do this more than once. Of course after two or three times, NTX begins to recognize the player and the situation, and begins to be a little less understanding.

by txtransplant 10/08/11, 02:23 pm

Have teams disintegrated after failing to make Lake Highlands but before the regular season begins because one or more players get these releases and there's not enough of a roster to compete with afterwards?

ETA: Please forgive me for daring to ask what happens to teams not in LH. lol

by Blank77 10/08/11, 04:52 pm

If it makes anyone feel better, none of the sitatuions I know about involve a player unhappy enough about their current league placement to ask for a release, everyone seems more peeved about coaching promises not met.

by BabyArm 10/08/11, 05:13 pm

Blank77 wrote:If it makes anyone feel better, none of the sitatuions I know about involve a player unhappy enough about their current league placement to ask for a release, everyone seems more peeved about coaching promises not met.

Even before any league games are played? It would seem that once a handful of games were played they could make a better assessment of what direction the coach was taking. It seems pretty premature or immature to be deciding this 1 week after QT.

by Blank77 10/08/11, 05:25 pm

Maybe so, but I could also understand, if it isn't going to work, get out before things get started. Unfortunate situation, that I am sure repeats itself every year.

by Guest 28/08/12, 05:05 pm

50/50 wrote:
Did you switch within the same club? Or, pay two club fees? Or, get your money back from the first club?

I also got a competitive release for my DD in our first year of Select. It was not too hard but I was able to convince Coach that signing was the best thing for my DD and his own reputation and he signed. As far as the money goes North Texas officially considers that an issue between parent and club only. They first want to know only if the DD broke any North Texas rules on or off the pitch. You will have to come to some sort of agreement with the club/coach on money, and it usually involves you paying more, and for sure not receiving a refund. You have to remember that the team fees were divided by a certain number of players and it is not right to go back and ask anyone to pay more money no matter how unhappy your new state of mind might be. In our case we had paid in full for the soccer year, as we should to honor our commitment to the team and other parents on the team. The new team asked only for Uniform money from us since they had already divided up the team fees with the original number of players. We did not ask for or receive any refund. In the bigger clubs where it is all about the $$ sometimes that is exactly what they will ask for to "sell" you a competitive release.

If we were able to get a release...and had to pay out the remainder of the contract...how do you go about looking for another team that would take your daughter and not make you pay additional fees? Also...what if you couldn't get the a competitive release...would it really damage credibility with other coaches if you simply quit the current team and just waited until June to sign again?

by ekkeeper1 28/08/12, 08:25 pm

soccerobsessed wrote:
50/50 wrote:
Did you switch within the same club? Or, pay two club fees? Or, get your money back from the first club?

I also got a competitive release for my DD in our first year of Select. It was not too hard but I was able to convince Coach that signing was the best thing for my DD and his own reputation and he signed. As far as the money goes North Texas officially considers that an issue between parent and club only. They first want to know only if the DD broke any North Texas rules on or off the pitch. You will have to come to some sort of agreement with the club/coach on money, and it usually involves you paying more, and for sure not receiving a refund. You have to remember that the team fees were divided by a certain number of players and it is not right to go back and ask anyone to pay more money no matter how unhappy your new state of mind might be. In our case we had paid in full for the soccer year, as we should to honor our commitment to the team and other parents on the team. The new team asked only for Uniform money from us since they had already divided up the team fees with the original number of players. We did not ask for or receive any refund. In the bigger clubs where it is all about the $$ sometimes that is exactly what they will ask for to "sell" you a competitive release.

If we were able to get a release...and had to pay out the remainder of the contract...how do you go about looking for another team that would take your daughter and not make you pay additional fees? Also...what if you couldn't get the a competitive release...would it really damage credibility with other coaches if you simply quit the current team and just waited until June to sign again?

You could play rec until June, or you may also be able to get a release to guest play/practice with others teams. Not sure if it is still the same now as it was when I played select soccer. I had a friend of mine in a similar situation and she was allowed to play rec and she guest played with the team that i played on in every tournament and trained with us even though she was not on the team. I dont know how much things have changed since then though

by Guest 28/08/12, 08:55 pm

soccerobsessed wrote:
50/50 wrote:
Did you switch within the same club? Or, pay two club fees? Or, get your money back from the first club?

I also got a competitive release for my DD in our first year of Select. It was not too hard but I was able to convince Coach that signing was the best thing for my DD and his own reputation and he signed. As far as the money goes North Texas officially considers that an issue between parent and club only. They first want to know only if the DD broke any North Texas rules on or off the pitch. You will have to come to some sort of agreement with the club/coach on money, and it usually involves you paying more, and for sure not receiving a refund. You have to remember that the team fees were divided by a certain number of players and it is not right to go back and ask anyone to pay more money no matter how unhappy your new state of mind might be. In our case we had paid in full for the soccer year, as we should to honor our commitment to the team and other parents on the team. The new team asked only for Uniform money from us since they had already divided up the team fees with the original number of players. We did not ask for or receive any refund. In the bigger clubs where it is all about the $$ sometimes that is exactly what they will ask for to "sell" you a competitive release.

If we were able to get a release...and had to pay out the remainder of the contract...how do you go about looking for another team that would take your daughter and not make you pay additional fees? Also...what if you couldn't get the a competitive release...would it really damage credibility with other coaches if you simply quit the current team and just waited until June to sign again?

It's up to the receiving team to decide if they will require you pay to join should your daughter get a competitive release. This early into the season, you would probably be expected to pay something... unless you can find a team that badly needs your daughter's services. In other words, if a team is short of players (injury, early departure, or whatever), the coach will be far more likely to work a deal for you or not charge at all. Of course, if the other parents find out, they might not be too happy; but that's for the coach and manager to resolve. It would be a good idea to (1) search for a team needing players and (2) be right up front with the coach that you're already out of money after just paying for an entire season to free your daughter.

You're asking about credibility. Credibility? In select soccer? No, it will not affect your daughter's credibility if she gets a rec release but keeps up her skills by practicing/doing tournaments with other teams. If she can play, a coach isn't going to care where she was rostered before. The bigger question is will you get branded as a cancer parent for signing your daughter and then quitting just 6 weeks later? Maybe. If you are a PITA parent, then your reputation precedes you anyway. The bottom line is: Do what's best for your daughter and let the chips fall where they may. Quit losing sleep about all of this and asking advice. Do what you need to do and move on. It's nothing but a stupid - and very expensive - child's sport.

by Hook It 28/08/12, 09:23 pm

Gunners wrote:
AllenAmerican wrote:
reapersweeper wrote:
jm23jm wrote:
AlterEgo wrote:Don't think it would be easy or you could have a mass exodus of players leaving teams that didn't make Lake Highlands. Crap, we didn't make D1 so time for a new team.
My little birdies tell me that there are at least 2 players looking to leave D1 teams and not for playing time reasons. One of the teams is easily top 10.
Very interesting twist to the plot.

I hope they are not from my teams. I would give them a release in a heartbeat. An unhappy parent or player can cause lots of problems.

I love this about you coach. Our old coach (99's) told us he would release our child, then wouldn't. Said he would let her practice with another coach through the year so she could maintain skills, then wouldn't allow it. It finally took almost four months for him to sign a release but only as long as it was where he said she could play. I don't post much and saw a whole thread on how you need to stick it out with the team because it teaches your daughter that they have to fight through the challenging times. Although I agree with that wholeheartedly, your coach has to be able to work with you as well. They have to be able to communicate with your child and set expectations. The problem is that most on that whole topic spoke in generalities but each situation is different. Sometimes you have to teach your DD that their personal development as a chid is much more important than having the coach completely disintegrate their self confidence, bully, and lie to them. Sometimes it is best to just walk away from that situation. I would rather teach my daughter that she can stand up for herself rather than allow someone to continue to degrade her as a person. Generally their isn't any other parent on that team that will stick their necks out for you unless it directly affects their child. It is the "it's better them than us" syndrom. They'll come up to you and talk about just how wrong it is that your DD is being treated that way, but do absolutely nothing to help. Saw it and lived it.

I believe at this level that if a parent/child asks for a release than they should get it. They aren't professional players and we shouldn't be so wrapped up in winning that we are scared to death they'll go play for another team. The ultimate goal should be about the development of the DD and their future in soccer.

Kudos to you coach for taking that stance and I hope that every coach would be gracious enough to check their pride at the door to allow the DD to move on and find a place they are comfortable.

My 01 decided not to play this year after playing for years on a top 10 team. If she ever decides to play again I would hope that it is with a quality coach that understands the individual needs of the players and not just the overall needs of the team (they are both important). Those are truly successful coaches in my opinion.

If someone is wants to get a release, it can be done. There are requirements. The easiest is to have the gaining coach and releasing coach's signatures allowing the transfer of the player. The other way is petitioning North Texas during the acceptable time to gain a release. Almost all of these are accepted as the coaches are too lazy to go up before the hearing. However, most of the time you will be leaving money on the table at the old team. Ask yourself if leaving the money is worth it. For us, our DD is much happier, slowly gaining her confidence back as a player. So well worth it.

Who are you trying to fool. This is America! It's always about winning....

Looks to me like the "bottom" in your avatar isn't winning much at all...

I would personally not want player to be able to move up in D-levels after the season started - other circumstances should be ableto be make in a reasonable way to allow for changing circumstances. It is all well covered in the various facts and stories about - nicely articulated!!

by Blank77 29/08/12, 07:35 pm

They will give pretty much anyone a competitive release after the season, even if you paid only partial dues. Just call NTSSA and let them know. Play rec or PSA in the fall, get your release in Dec and play wherever you want in the Spring.

Now if you paid no dues, your contract is invalid and you can get a release today from NTSSA. If you paid ALL your dues, then wow, that seems a little short sighted.

by letemplay 29/08/12, 09:29 pm

Blank77 wrote:They will give pretty much anyone a competitive release after the season, even if you paid only partial dues. Just call NTSSA and let them know. Play rec or PSA in the fall, get your release in Dec and play wherever you want in the Spring.

Now if you paid no dues, your contract is invalid and you can get a release today from NTSSA. If you paid ALL your dues, then wow, that seems a little short sighted.

Not sure where you got your info, but after working with the system unless your club is willing to give you "full" release (which is very rare)then you can only get a release to recreational soccer which is in effect for the full term of the contract you signed with the club. You will be able to practice and guest play with any select team you choose but you cannot join a select roster again until the following July. You can join a rec team though.

by Blank77 29/08/12, 10:14 pm

letemplay wrote:
Blank77 wrote:They will give pretty much anyone a competitive release after the season, even if you paid only partial dues. Just call NTSSA and let them know. Play rec or PSA in the fall, get your release in Dec and play wherever you want in the Spring.

Now if you paid no dues, your contract is invalid and you can get a release today from NTSSA. If you paid ALL your dues, then wow, that seems a little short sighted.

Not sure where you got your info, but after working with the system unless your club is willing to give you "full" release (which is very rare)then you can only get a release to recreational soccer which is in effect for the full term of the contract you signed with the club. You will be able to practice and guest play with any select team you choose but you cannot join a select roster again until the following July. You can join a rec team though.

I get my info from experience, the things I metioned all happened to people last season. I know what the rules are, but if you call and talk to NTSSA you can get a competitive release at the end of Fall. Also, I know for a fact if you havent paid dues, your contract is worthless. NTSSA will give you a competitive release immediately. Call Rhonda at NTSSA, and talk with her - they do work with people. Also, never believe your club or coach - they all lie and they dont have to give you the release as you can get it from NTSSA with no say so from them. I know a big club last year that even gave a refund to a player at the middle of the season. It took some work, but they paid all dues up front, things didnt work out and they kept fighting even after the club and coach told them 100% no refunds - well they got a check back. Too many people just give in when the coach/club tell them things that just arent true.

by letemplay 29/08/12, 10:51 pm

Blank77 wrote:
letemplay wrote:
Blank77 wrote:They will give pretty much anyone a competitive release after the season, even if you paid only partial dues. Just call NTSSA and let them know. Play rec or PSA in the fall, get your release in Dec and play wherever you want in the Spring.

Now if you paid no dues, your contract is invalid and you can get a release today from NTSSA. If you paid ALL your dues, then wow, that seems a little short sighted.

Not sure where you got your info, but after working with the system unless your club is willing to give you "full" release (which is very rare)then you can only get a release to recreational soccer which is in effect for the full term of the contract you signed with the club. You will be able to practice and guest play with any select team you choose but you cannot join a select roster again until the following July. You can join a rec team though.

I get my info from experience, the things I metioned all happened to people last season. I know what the rules are, but if you call and talk to NTSSA you can get a competitive release at the end of Fall. Also, I know for a fact if you havent paid dues, your contract is worthless. NTSSA will give you a competitive release immediately. Call Rhonda at NTSSA, and talk with her - they do work with people. Also, never believe your club or coach - they all lie and they dont have to give you the release as you can get it from NTSSA with no say so from them. I know a big club last year that even gave a refund to a player at the middle of the season. It took some work, but they paid all dues up front, things didnt work out and they kept fighting even after the club and coach told them 100% no refunds - well they got a check back. Too many people just give in when the coach/club tell them things that just arent true.

Not arguing the money. Dues are ultimately between the team/club and the player and over the years I have seen a lot of different scenarios play out and money does not affect your release. And yes, you can get a release without the coach/clubs consent, but only a release to rec. Kathy will confirm this. As for the people you know it happened to, unless NTSSA has gotten soft, they will help you as best they can but do not bend the rules very often.

by Hook It 30/08/12, 08:01 am

letemplay wrote:
Blank77 wrote:
letemplay wrote:
Blank77 wrote:They will give pretty much anyone a competitive release after the season, even if you paid only partial dues. Just call NTSSA and let them know. Play rec or PSA in the fall, get your release in Dec and play wherever you want in the Spring.

Now if you paid no dues, your contract is invalid and you can get a release today from NTSSA. If you paid ALL your dues, then wow, that seems a little short sighted.

Not sure where you got your info, but after working with the system unless your club is willing to give you "full" release (which is very rare)then you can only get a release to recreational soccer which is in effect for the full term of the contract you signed with the club. You will be able to practice and guest play with any select team you choose but you cannot join a select roster again until the following July. You can join a rec team though.

I get my info from experience, the things I metioned all happened to people last season. I know what the rules are, but if you call and talk to NTSSA you can get a competitive release at the end of Fall. Also, I know for a fact if you havent paid dues, your contract is worthless. NTSSA will give you a competitive release immediately. Call Rhonda at NTSSA, and talk with her - they do work with people. Also, never believe your club or coach - they all lie and they dont have to give you the release as you can get it from NTSSA with no say so from them. I know a big club last year that even gave a refund to a player at the middle of the season. It took some work, but they paid all dues up front, things didnt work out and they kept fighting even after the club and coach told them 100% no refunds - well they got a check back. Too many people just give in when the coach/club tell them things that just arent true.

Not arguing the money. Dues are ultimately between the team/club and the player and over the years I have seen a lot of different scenarios play out and money does not affect your release. And yes, you can get a release without the coach/clubs consent, but only a release to rec. Kathy will confirm this. As for the people you know it happened to, unless NTSSA has gotten soft, they will help you as best they can but do not bend the rules very often.

Other factors....there are clubs clearly driven with a authortative structure and then thier are clubs in which the coaches really call all the shots (bouncers). I think you both have valid points, but the org structure play a big role and certianly the coach's mindset will steer these ships.... drunken

by Guest 30/08/12, 03:35 pm

Step 1. Ask your coach for a release. Mostl likey, the answer will be NO, but now he/she knows you want to leave

Step 2. Contact NTX Soccer. ronda@ntxsoccer.org. They'll send you or tell how to print a release form. Then they'll tell you to repeat Step1. He/She will probably say no again. If you can, get the anti-Christ to sign the form and check the box for no-release. He/She may not do even this, being the anti-Christ and all. No matter.

Step 3. Send form back to NTX Soccer. If you were released, you done. If you were not release, include a note explaining that you want to be released still and NTX Soccer will release you to recreation soccer. This means that you can practice with the team of your choice and guest play in tournaments, but NO LEAGUE PLAY.

Step 4. Ask NTX Soccer for a board hearing requesting a FULL RELEASE. NTX Soccer will send the coach a letter notifying him/her that this hearing has been requested. The anti-Christ has 10 business days to reply. If the anti-Christ does not reply in 10 business days then NTX Soccer will grant you a full release and your done. If the anti-Christ does reply, then you and the anti-Christ will go to the hearing and state your respective cases and the board will make a decision.

by Guest 30/08/12, 04:19 pm

Your contract may be enforcable regardless

by DrSoccer 30/08/12, 04:28 pm

Your dd has to stay. She is legally bound to show up to every practice, every game. She has to do whatever the coach says. You have to pay your dues, go to every tournament, do all the fundraising. If the coach is verbally abusive toward your dd tell her it's her fault for having a bad practice or game. If he told her she was a forward an then plays her at defender or not at all, then tell her she was never really that good after all. If she loses her confidence and desire to play then she's just not a team player. Whatever you do don't question your coach, he's an expert on raising 11yr old girls, treating them with respect, instilling confidence, and the love of the sport in them.

by futbollove 30/08/12, 04:43 pm

Gumby wrote:Your contract may be enforcable regardless

Not true.

And you were doing so well.

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